SimplePHP, not to be confused with plain old PHP, or its distant cousin ComplicatedPHP, is the universal standard for creating intergalactic web novelties. It's renowned for allowing even the most intellectually challenged beings to design websites that can, on occasion, actually do something useful - like ordering a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster online or registering for the annual Vogon poetry recital (attendance not recommended).
Should you find yourself coding in SimplePHP during your space travels, ensure you are seated comfortably away from any blunt objects. The user manual has been known to cause spontaneous bouts of snoozing in mid-read.
SimplePHP can usually be found in the less fashionable districts of the programmer's quadrant, where the code is cheap and the coffee is cheaper.
One should always avoid the infamous '404 Nebula'. It's said that programmers who enter it seeking answers to SimplePHP errors never return, forever cursed to wander its void in a state of perpetual confusion.
The 'Simple' in SimplePHP is actually an acronym for 'Slightly Intimidating, Mostly Pointless, Largely Exasperating', which coincidentally is also what most users feel after their first 42 attempts at installing it.
If you're considering learning SimplePHP, why not indulge in the 'Learn SimplePHP While You Sleep' sub-etha audio course. Guaranteed to be at least as effective as actually being awake during your studies.
3 days ago
The Towel, in interstellar travel, is arguably the most massively useful thing an intergalactic hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value - you can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a mini-raft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or to avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you – daft as a brush, but very ravenous); and of course, you can dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
3 days ago
Borgon poetry is to poetry what a sledgehammer is to egg cracking – effective yet inadvisably overzealous. Renowned across galaxies for its ability to induce both existential dread and a peculiar desire to purchase earplugs, Borgon poetry is the auditory equivalent of a supernova confined to a broom cupboard. Its meter is so irregular it could provoke a mathematician into a nervous breakdown, and its rhyme scheme appears to have been modeled after the flight path of a drunken Gagrakackan Stink Beetle.