The Keyboard Warrior, a close cousin of the Common Internet Troll, is a creature of immense stamina and seemingly endless time. They inhabit the vast plains of cybernetic space, thriving in the lush underbrush of comment sections and forums. With a diet consisting solely of other people's patience and self-esteem, they have evolved to possess an extraordinarily thick skin, impervious to logic, reason, or the occasional well-intentioned advice to 'just go outside.'
Traveling across the digital realm? Keep your wits about you and your sarcasm detector finely tuned. Engage with a Keyboard Warrior, and you may find your itinerary indefinitely delayed by fruitless debates.
Keyboard Warriors can be found under the shroud of anonymity, often lurking in the darkest corners of social media platforms, awaiting the opportune moment to pounce on an unsuspecting typo or unpopular opinion.
Avoid feeding them - they grow stronger with attention. Do not attempt to reason with them; it's like teaching a Vogon to recite romantic poetry—futile and potentially hazardous to your health.
Fascinatingly, Keyboard Warriors have developed an intricate language composed entirely of acronyms, emojis, and the judicious use of caps lock, which they use to convey subtle nuances in their cries of digital war.
Are you tired of endless online quarrels? Try the Cosmic Calm keyboard! Each key softly whispers 'don't engage' in soothing tones, guaranteed to reduce your intergalactic online battles by up to 42%.
15 days ago
The Zebra is a peculiar creature often mistaken for a horse in pyjamas or the result of an indecisive designer who couldn't choose between black and white. Known for their dazzling stripes, which confuse predators, fashion designers, and occasionally themselves, zebras are the galactic standard for standing out in a crowd, even when the crowd is, in fact, other zebras.
23 days ago
Venus, the second rock from the Sun, named after the Roman goddess of love and beauty, has long been devoid of moons, satellites, or even party invitations from the more popular planets. This lack of celestial company has led to various hypotheses, including the idea that Venus, in a fit of pique, once had moons but uninvited them due to their poor table manners and incessant lunar howling. The truth is a tad more scientific but infinitely less exciting – Venus simply doesn't have any moons. Some say it's due to its overbearing gravity, while others believe the moons are just fashionably late.