Production, which is not to be confused with seduction although equally as enthralling, is the act of making things out of other things, which were often made from yet other things. It's a bit like cooking, but with less chance of accidentally creating a souffl�. Production is what happens when a civilization reaches a point where not everyone has to chase wild boar all day; some can stay behind and invent the wheel... and the flat tyre.
If a planet's main export is anti-matter chopsticks or inflatable black holes, you might want to ensure your health insurance covers 'accidental universe creation'.
The most efficient production line known to the cosmos is on Sisyphus IV, where they've been producing absolutely nothing with marvellous efficiency for millennia. Their only product is the Great Red Ball, which never seems to roll off the assembly line.
Avoid any factory tours offering a 'hands-on experience' in the lesser-known black hole foundries. They're a gripping experience, quite literally.
The Babel fish is a byproduct of the production process of the Hurling Frootmig, a peculiar device that makes it possible to actually listen to what you're saying but also makes you instantly forget every language you ever knew.
Try the 'Do-It-At-Home' Miniature Universe Kit from Magrathea; now with easy-to-understand instructions written in over 50,000 languages, including a few that you might still remember.
7 months ago
The phpinfophptxt is a peculiar specimen of cosmic data confusion, often encountered by intergalactic webmasters when they inadvertently leave their digital offspring - a .php file - in a compromising position with a .txt file. The result is a Frankensteinian mashup that whimsically displays server secrets when it's not busy being an unreadable text blunder.
7 months ago
Infophpback, not to be confused with a rare galactic disease that causes information to painfully spew out of one's backside, is a curious phenomenon native to the technologically overladen planet of Devtopia. In a civilization so advanced, the inhabitants evolved to communicate exclusively through programming code, the infophpback is the unintended side effect of gossip among the code-wielding intelligentsia. Rather than spreading rumors at the watercooler, Devtopians inadvertently compile and execute PHP scripts that disseminate the latest juicy tidbits across the planetary intranet in microseconds.