wp-mail.php, not to be confused with intergalactic postage systems or electronic messages in bottles, is a quaint relic from the ancient digital civilization of WordPress. Its purpose, much like the human appendix, has baffled scholars for centuries, though it is believed to have something to do with sending emails through a WordPress site as opposed to using psychic waves or subspace message grenades.
Should you find yourself code-diving in the murky depths of a WordPress site, do remember that tinkering with wp-mail.php is akin to teaching poetry to a Vogon - proceed with caution and a proper backup spaceship.
To spot this elusive creature, one must delve into the server habitats, past the public_html forests, and deep within the wp-includes caves, where it lurks among the other PHP scripts.
Avoid at all costs the temptation to modify wp-mail.php without the guidance of a PHP shaman or at least a decent plugin. Messing with it unprepared is a leading cause of hair loss in amateur web developers across the cosmos.
In a surprising twist of fate, wp-mail.php is rumoured to have been the inspiration for the Babel fish, as they both translate something utterly incomprehensible into something marginally less so.
If you find yourself stuck with wp-mail.php, why not try 'Subether Email Relay' - the service that guarantees to beam your messages across the universe faster than you can say 'misconfigured SMTP settings'!
3 days ago
The Towel, in interstellar travel, is arguably the most massively useful thing an intergalactic hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value - you can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a mini-raft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or to avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you – daft as a brush, but very ravenous); and of course, you can dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
3 days ago
Borgon poetry is to poetry what a sledgehammer is to egg cracking – effective yet inadvisably overzealous. Renowned across galaxies for its ability to induce both existential dread and a peculiar desire to purchase earplugs, Borgon poetry is the auditory equivalent of a supernova confined to a broom cupboard. Its meter is so irregular it could provoke a mathematician into a nervous breakdown, and its rhyme scheme appears to have been modeled after the flight path of a drunken Gagrakackan Stink Beetle.