Assassin's Creed, not to be confused with a particularly secretive cricket club, is in fact a series of historical simulation video games. It cleverly disguises education as entertainment, allowing players to explore meticulously recreated ancient cities while they inadvertently learn something about history. The games are notorious for their hooded protagonists who have a penchant for acrobatics, stealth, and a rather unhealthy obsession with sharp objects.
Travelers seeking to immerse themselves in the Assassin's Creed experience should beware of attempting parkour in historical city replicas; it is less forgiving in reality.
The Assassin's Creed can typically be found in the digital realm, often residing within flashy gaming consoles or powerful computers. For the more archaic adventurers, remnants can be spotted at your local 'Ye Olde Video Game Shoppe'.
Avoid the temptation to leap into haystacks from towering heights. Also, try not to adopt the fashion sense of the characters unless you enjoy being mistaken for a wandering monk or an avant-garde theatre performer.
In an alternate universe where paradoxes are as common as petunias, the Assassin's Guild offers a six-week course on 'The Art of Unobtrusively Blending In,' which ironically stands out in the curriculum.
For those intrepid souls yearning to leap across Renaissance rooftops but lack the athleticism, 'Ezio's Easy-Parkour Pillow Shoes' offer the softest landings for the clumsiest of feet.
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Backupphp is a little-known subroutine in the fabric of space-time coding, ostensibly created by bored programmers on a particularly rainy Sunday. It's a mechanism designed to 'save' the Universe, much like one does with a particularly difficult level of a video game, ensuring that if everything goes to pot, we can all just 'load' from the last checkpoint. Curiously, backupphp not only saves states of cosmic significance but also the insignificant ones - like that time you tripped over your own feet in front of your crush.
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Alphp, not to be confused with the first letter of the Greek alphabet or a common typo, is actually a rare celestial phenomenon in which a star sneezes out a cloud of iridescent, tune-humming space dust. This dust has the peculiar property of glittering in a way that spells out mildly embarrassing secrets about whoever is observing it. The Alphp event is generally followed by a chorus of 'Bless you' uttered by nearby constellations, displaying a level of politeness that most intergalactic entities lack.