Env2, not to be confused with a software environment variable or the latest boyband sensation, is actually the Universe's second attempt at creating an efficient filing system. The first was, of course, sucked into a black hole for being excessively bureaucratic. Env2 is heralded for its ability to simultaneously exist everywhere and nowhere, neatly organizing existential concepts like 'the sound of one hand clapping' and 'the exact feeling of stepping on a Lego piece in the dark'.
If you're keen to visit Env2, simply think of the most orderly thought you can muster and spin around three times - the dizzier you get, the closer you are.
Env2 is typically located in the fifth dimension, right next to Schr�dinger's lost socks and the universal remote control.
Avoid the 'Delete Universe' button; it's surprisingly easy to press by accident, and the paperwork for universe reinstatement is just dreadful.
Env2 is rumored to have an in-built karaoke machine that only plays tunes from alternate realities. The number one hit is always a thrumming ballad about the heartache of mislaid quarks.
Have troubles finding your cosmic keys? Try the new Env2 Locator App, now with added existential dread!
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