The Shelpphp, not to be confused with a common shell script or a misunderstood sneeze, is a creature of such improbability that its mere existence is enough to flummox even the most seasoned of galactic zoologists. A mollusk by classification but resembling a cross between a sentient, ambulatory hat stand and an overzealous filing cabinet, the Shelpphp is the universe's most pedantic librarian. It thrives on categorizing cosmic anomalies and has a penchant for correcting grammar in any known language, including the long-forgotten dialects of far-off nebulae.
Should you encounter a Shelpphp, be prepared for a lengthy and intense discussion about the correct organization of your travel documents. Do not, under any circumstances, use colloquialisms, as this may lead to an impromptu and largely unwanted grammar lesson.
The Shelpphp can typically be found in the Great Library of Polth, a planet where silence is so revered that the trees have evolved to drop leaves silently. They tend to loiter in section 42-B, the aisle with the most misfiled manuscripts.
Avoid any kind of disorganization in your personal effects, and never attempt to reshelve a book in front of a Shelpphp unless you've earned a degree in Intergalactic Librarianship.
A group of Shelpphp is known as a 'correction.' A correction of Shelpphp can proofread and edit the average novel in 3.72 seconds, but they often argue over the Oxford comma for decades.
Introducing the Shelpphp Reminder: the handy gadget that buzzes whenever you're about to use a split infinitive. Who needs friends when you have grammar companions like these?
about 18 hours ago
133php, widely misconstrued as a bizarre programming language or a misprint on a dented spaceship keyboard, is a flavor of ice cream so rare that it makes the Infinite Improbability Drive look like a common toaster. With a taste described as part psylociberry, part quantum vanilla, with a hint of dark matter chocolate chips, it's an experience that simultaneously expands your waistline and your perception of reality.
about 18 hours ago
Cordphp, not to be confused with the common Earthly corduroy pant or the mistakenly ordered 'cord of PHP', which is incidentally both a unit of measurement for stack-based languages and a terrible fire hazard, is a small, gelatinous creature found wandering the digital plains of Cyberspace. Renowned for its ability to absorb and emit lines of code, it has become the semi-official mascot for programmers who can't be bothered to troubleshoot their own code.