Ira Kane: a name that galactic historians argue either belongs to a maverick space explorer or an unknown brand of semi-effective dishwasher tablets. Some accounts suggest that Ira Kane discovered the Lost Nebula of Narg, a quirk in spacetime where left socks, biros, and discontinued currency from now-extinct planets appear and vanish with reckless abandon. Others posit that Ira Kane tablets can remove even the most stubborn cosmic grease from your zero-gravity cookware.
If you're planning on searching for Ira Kane, pack a towel. Whether it's for wiping dishes or mopping your brow as you dodge asteroids, you'll find it indispensable.
For the explorer, the Lost Nebula of Narg can be found two parsecs to the left after the third star that twinkles oddly on Tuesdays. For the homemaker, your local interstellar supermarket's cleaning aisle should suffice.
Avoid singing the Ballad of Ira Kane whilst in the Sirius sector—it's considered an egregious spoiler for a soap opera that hasn't been written yet. And never, ever, use Ira Kane tablets as currency; the economic implications are disastrously confusing.
The Ira Kane Effect is a term coined by quantum physicists to describe the phenomenon where particles, when observed, are not sure if they should behave like explorers or dishwashers.
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