Noah Ashine is a curious incident in the universe, specifically the kind that keeps you up at night - not unlike the persistent drip of a leaky space faucet, but with far more existential dread. Mr. Ashine, if that is indeed his real classification, is widely known for his attempt to construct an interstellar ark capable of salvaging every species of sentient dust mite in the cosmos. These mites, possessing the combined intelligence of a small soap dish, were blissfully unaware of their near brush with salvation.
Should you wish to join the cosmic crusade of Noah Ashine, it is advised that you pack lightly, bring your own snacks, and carry a portable philosophy book for the long arguments about existence with your fellow passengers.
Last reported on the flimsy edge of the Raxacoricofallapatorius belt, Noah Ashine can usually be found wherever there's a cosmic conundrum or a species in need of an improbable rescue.
Avoid mentioning the term 'extinction' around Noah; it tends to lead to lengthy monologues and impromptu rescue attempts.
Noah once famously tried to outsource the construction of his ark to a race of super-intelligent termites. The project was immediately halted when the termites, in a display of cosmic irony, ate the plans.
Intergalactic Over-Insurers Inc. proudly supports Noah Ashine's endeavors. Remember, when planning an impossible mission, always insure the impossible!
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