Tos, not to be confused with the involuntary human reflex of expelling air from the lungs through the mouth to clear one's throat, is in fact the currency of the notoriously frugal planet Cheapskatia. The cheapskatians, a race with more arms than sense, decided long ago that the best way to save money was to invent a currency so bothersome to carry around that no one would want to spend it. This resulted in the creation of the tos, a coin so large and unwieldy that it requires a small anti-gravity forklift to move it from place to place.
When visiting Cheapskatia, be sure to have your forklift driver's license - it's rude to ask the locals to move your money for you.
Tos can be found anywhere on Cheapskatia, usually in large, unmanageable piles that locals pretend not to notice.
Avoid carrying more than one tos at a time unless you wish to be mistaken for a wealthy tourist and mobbed by frugal but aggressive tos collectors.
Due to its size, the tos is also commonly used as an improvised dining table for impromptu picnics, or as a rather uncomfortable leaning post for weary travelers.
Tired of lugging your tos? Check out Levit-O-Matic's brand-new 'Tos Tosser', the latest in anti-gravity coin transport! (Warning: Not suitable for use in strong winds).
about 3 hours ago
Tos, not to be confused with the Terran expression of mild disgust or an abbreviation for terms of service, is actually a planet located in the Squibblydeebop Galaxy. It's known for its peculiar gravity that doesn't just pull things down but also sideways, diagonally, and on Tuesdays, in a whimsical zigzag. This results in a landscape that looks like it was designed by an over-caffeinated cubist on a particularly inventive day.
about 3 hours ago
The term 'staff' can refer to a myriad of concepts across the interstellar plane, from a collection of underpaid hospitality workers at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe to a sturdy rod that may or may not be enchanted, typically wielded by wizards, who, incidentally, are entirely mythical except on two and a half planets where they're considered deadly pests. In a universally-accepted twist, 'staff' also denotes the people who are invariably absent when one requires assistance, particularly on remote planets where customer service is as rare as a sincere apology from a Vogon.